After her uncle died, Linda Lehman Thomas sought out a spiritual director as a way to heal childhood trauma, but it affected her life even more deeply than she expected.
Linda Lehman Thomas lives in Goshen, Indiana, and is the director of Pathways Retreat, a spiritual retreat center for rest, reflection and renewal. She finds joy in accompanying people as a spiritual director and gestalt spiritual counselor, talking walks in nature, and playing with her new puppy.
________________________________________
Why did I begin meeting with a spiritual director/companion? My short answer is that I needed healing and a pastor.
When I was 30, my uncle, Gerald, died of cancer. He and my aunt, Geri, had served in Bolivia for many years, through what is now Mennonite Mission Network, and when they returned to the United States, Gerald continued working for the mission organization.
His memorial service was meaningful, because the officiant knew Gerald well and, upon further sharing, I realized that many people could have officiated his service. Gerald was well-known and loved by many clergy-type folks. I recognized that if I died the next day, no one could officiate a meaningful service for me — which I wanted. And since I am a pastor’s spouse, it wouldn’t be appropriate for him to officiate. I also knew that, if life brought hardship, as it does, and I needed a pastor, I didn’t have one.
Secondly, as a survivor of childhood trauma and loss, I needed healing. A therapist I was working with at the time noticed that my deepest wound was spiritual. It was related to the age-old question of why bad things happen to good people. She recommended that I meet with a spiritual director.
So I sought out Mary Herr, who was a co-founder and co-director of The Hermitage in Three Rivers, Michigan. This began my monthly rhythm of spending a day of silence and solitude, during which, at some point, I met with Mary. This practice changed my life and was instrumental in the healing of my childhood trauma. Eventually, it led to me pursuing further schooling and becoming certified as a spiritual director and gestalt spiritual counselor.
Often, people think that spiritual direction and companionship is for pastors or professional ministry types. The reality is that it is for anyone. As a director, I’ve met with many more non-clergy folks than with clergy.
Another reality is that, today, there are many trained spiritual directors available — both women and men. Both Anabaptist Mennonite Biblical Seminary and Eastern Mennonite Seminary offer training programs for spiritual directors. For a listing of Mennonite spiritual directors, see the Mennonite Spiritual Directors Network website; for an ecumenical and interfaith listing, see Spiritual Directors International’s listing.
If the practice of spiritual direction sounds like it might be helpful in your life now, I encourage you to contact one of these companions. Or if such a ministry might be helpful for someone you know, spread the word!
Learn more about the Mennonite Spiritual Directors Network at mennosdn.org.
You can find links to the Spiritual Directors Network website and other congregational and ministerial resources on MC USA’s Church Vitality webpage: https://www.mennoniteusa.org/
The views and opinions expressed in this blog belong to the author and are not intended to represent the views of the MC USA Executive Board or staff.